"Laughter is infectious so don't worry, there's no contagions in this book! Monstermatt should give out a bottle of Pepto with each book! These jokes make my stomach hurt!"
He's baaaaaaaack! Monstermatt Patterson is the wizard of bad monster jokes. In his first joke book, Ha-Ha! Horror, he made us groan with his horrible puns and twisted sense of humor. Now he is back with more...more art, more monster minutes, and yes...more rancid rhymes. If you survived the first book, we dare you to attempt another.
Now available in print - ebook to follow!
"Watch out for The Creature, and Monstermatt's terrible jokes!"
Why would bats need space helmets? Only cover artist Monstermatt Patterson knows... for now.
Stay tuned for the reveal of an unannounced anthology, one that exists because there was just too much insanity for one book to contain!
We are disgustingly pleased to announce that Ha-Ha! Horror, the first single-author collection we published, won in the Humor category at the President's Awards banquet for the Florida Authors & Publishers Association.
Did we know we had a winner? Yes, we did, because we were familiar with Monstermatt's work before the MAHLLC bat was even born. We knew he was talented, he was funny, and he would work like a demon to get things right. All we needed to do was present his art and (admittedly godawful) jokes in the best format possible.
We are so very, very proud of you, Matt. Thanks for publishing with us.
We are pleased to announce that we have drawn the winners for the free copies of Ha-Ha! Horror. One will be sent to Germany, the other to Florida. Oddly enough, the Florida fan was drawn by Monstermatt. Go figure...
Both winners have been notified and Monstermatt has their addresses. Congratulations!
In other news: since we became listed at Duotrope, we've received a number of novel submissions. This is great, but we're also plowing through subs for three different open anthologies at the moment. So.... we will close for novel subs on April 30th, Walpurgisnacht. We want the time to give our current novel subs a decent lookover.
IF WE ASKED YOU TO SEND US A FULL, we still want it. If you've subbed but haven't heard back yet, you are in the queue. Doesn't that sound British of us?
DON'T STOP SENDING US SHORT STORIES. We especially need more subs for History and Horror, Oh My! and History and Mystery, Oh My! We only opened for those last month.
Got it? Thanks!
We hope our American readers had a happy Fangs-giving! And in that vein of humor, we introduce you to Monstermatt Patterson.
Monstermatt narrates 'The Monster Minute' on the 6 Foot Plus podcast, which is either the best or worst minute of the show. He's an artist, a painter, and the wizard of bad monster jokes. His catalogic command of horror film knowledge is only equaled by his terrifying talent for creating and illustrating bad puns.
We at MAHLLC are proud to have him as our first book-length author. If you love monsters, puns, or bad jokes, we urge you to consider Ha-Ha! Horror, written and illustrated by Monstermatt and available at Amazon. Learn more about the man himself now:
Q. I must ask: what started you down this dark, twisted road?
I used to watch late night horror films with our aunt, my mom and my sisters, while my father's band was playing gigs. The first one I can actually recall, is Horror of Dracula. I had always wanted to create something in the genre, but never really had the chance until rotator cuff surgery. Longgg story! Until then, it was enjoying the work of others. I devoured horror films, comics, magazines, records, etc.
Since then, I've had the opportunity to be involved horror films, both on camera or behind. Among other things.
Q. Tell us more about 6 Foot Plus and the Monster Minute.
6 Foot Plus recruited me to do my shtick, and it's been the most pleasant experience! I try to write at least 5 jokes per show, give or take. Strange Jason, the host, gave me free reign to utilize the platform and format as I saw fit.
Sometimes, I do 3 or 4 different voice characters in an episode.
Q. Which monster is your favorite?
Frankenstein. Specifically, Boris Karloff, in Son of Frankenstein. No matter what the camera angle or scene, he's physically filled out, and looks truly powerful. Not that his previous stints as the monster were bad or anything. It's a great trilogy!
Q. Can you tell us a little about your creative process? Do you lock yourself in an attic with a paintbrush and a razor? Read entrails?
Ugh, now that's twisted! Actually, when I return to the crypt from my day job, I find the need to create late at night. It's been that way for 3 years, now. I paint, sculpt, draw, write, while listening to classical music, orchestral movie scores, and jazz, like Ella Fitzgerald -with Louis Armstrong, etc.
Q. What do you do when you're not creating horrible puns?
Actually, no matter what I'm doing in the course of the day, I always have pieces of jokes swirling in my head.
There's something cooking, 24/7!
Q. What would you like to learn to do that you haven’t?
Too many things to list!
I'll get to most of them. Next week, I hope to learn putting the lid back on the mustard jar. It's gonna be tough!
Q. If you had to choose, who would you consider a mentor and how is that reflected in your work?
Too tough! I plead the fifth...of Jack Daniels! I mean, I don't know that I can narrow that down.
Mad Magazine had such an influence on me, since forever! Cracked Magazine, monster specials. Benny Hill, and other television comedians, too. That's just a small sample. But, to explain, there's just something about the science and mechanics of comedy, that speak to me. I totally get, the need for timing, banter, establishing a rhythm, everything. I've been corny and sarcastic forever, so I'm doing what should come naturally.
Jack Pierce, Don Post, Lon Chaney Sr., Frank Frazetta, Basil Gogos and more. There's something truly fulfilling to bring something to life, from a piece of clay or empty canvas.
A man who loves Ella Fitzgerald, Mad Magazine, and Benny Hill? Swoon!
Check out Ha-Ha! Horror at Amazon. The preview function for the ebook will give you a sample of Monstermatt's artwork and his groan-inducing jokes.
By the way, the jokes are all clean, so this book is suitable for gift-giving to any horror film aficionado. I've also been told it makes an excellent book to keep in the bathroom... at least until you read the Street Trash chapter.
Enjoy the rest of your horror-days!
"I laughed, I groaned, I shook my head in disbelief....Ha-Ha! Horror will bring a grin to the faces of adults and kids alike..."
Here's your first taste of Ha-Ha! Horror from the masterful Monstermatt Patterson.
Who is Monstermatt? He's a horror artist and illustrator who does monster portraits and masks, and a nominee for Best Painter in the Artvoice 2013 Best of Buffalo Awards. He narrates 'The Monster Minute' on the 6' Plus podcast, which is either the best or worst minute of the show. He is the wizard of bad monster jokes, and will soon be sharing them with you.
Ha-Ha! Horror will soon be available from Mystery and Horror, LLC.
Monstermatt's blogs are at:
http://hahahorror.gravediggerslocal.com/ (you can see some of his material there)
The 6' + podcasts:
Mystery and Horror, LLC, is an indie press interested in what the name suggests.
Contact us at: firstname.lastname@example.org